Useless...
People keep sending me these things, so I will continue to bore you with them!
Let's play!
But, first, The goal with these question type thingys is to reveal NOTHING about me. That is, if you don't know much about me now, the following reveals nothing further. If anything, it reveals that 1) I have too much time on my hands, 2) am not very clever, 3) Could possibly live a very non-productive life. With that said, here is to non-productivity!
PROST!!!
100 Completely Useless and NON revealing Facts About Me
1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
I don’t usually have that one that opens into “other side” open much. This little girl got sucked in and she keeps calling for her mother. Shut-up, kid. The one to Narnia? I nailed that one shut almost immediately. Nobody, I mean nobody is going to be going and playing with Lions on my watch. No sir!
2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels?
Often. Damn fine eating. Great with Syrup!
3. What’s your favorite love story?
The typical one… boy meets girl… girl dumps boy. Boy gets back together with girl. Girl cheats on guy. Girl dies in tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.
…. Good year?
… No, the worst!
(Thanks “Naked Gun”)
4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
Yes. It was a railroad crossing sign near my summer home in Wisconsin. It had bullet holes in it. I still have it.
Now, what the hell am I going to do with it?
5. Last person that kissed you?
I guess, recently, it was my baby niece. She said good-bye and then Happy Thanksgiving. Which is really interesting, because it was last Saturday.
6. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
On a Magazine, sure… In a Magazine. Kinda cramped. I am not a small person.
12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
No. Ummm… No. I actually try to avoid walking. I sooo want one of the Segways.
13. Have you ever camped in the woods?
Sure, I guess. Is this a useless fact, or just kinda a boring fact.
14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
Yes, sure. I am not one who is shy from making a fool of myself. I consider that, you know, fool making, one of my hobbies! Go hobbies!
15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
I write with them too. Personally, I prefer candy bars. However, you can't write with those... well.
16. How many people have you slept with this week?
Counting my three pillows, remote control, reading book, yesterday’s clothing, a comforter, another comforter, last week's clothing, a sock… nobody. Well, nobody that I can find.
18. What is your "song of the week"?
Christmas Time is Here by the great Vince Guraldi.
19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Ummmm… I wear orange and blue. That’s kinda pink, right? No? Okay, then no.
20.Do you still watch cartoons?
Hell yeah! I think, most of the time, that’s all I watch.
22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
No where! I would spend that shit before I even thought about burying it. This is a stupid question.
23. What do you drink with dinner?
That implies I eat dinner. I haven’t eaten a square meal in weeks.
24. What sauce do you dip Chicken McNuggets in?
I don’t eat chicken nuggets, but I do dip chicken wings in Ranch and Blue Cheese AND.. that’s about it.
25. What is your favorite food/cuisine?
Popcorn and Popcorn cuisine… That’s in the freezer section.
26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Shoot… I have many. MANY!
28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
I scouted for girls. Not very lucky on that front. Sigh.
30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
Ummmm…… Let me think. Hmmm… Well… no… I guess it was Gemma in the Third Grade. There, you can see, is where I started my great communication skills or lack there of. Heh. Writing people! Whateva!
31. Can you change the oil on a car?
Change it to what?
32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Sure. I got a couple. What’s it to you? Trying to make yourself feel better?
33. Run out of gas?
Yeah, I am. I kinda feel sluggish and tired all of sudden. Too many damn questions!
34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
The Edible kind. Plastic sandwiches? No. They taste all yucky.
35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Cats.
36. What is your usual bedtime?
I haven’t had a usual bedtime ever. Unusual, sure. That would be next week.
37. Are you lazy?
Hell yeah! I am surprised I made it to question 37.
38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
Other kids!
40. How many languages can you speak?
Counting English? 1000… 999 of those are only understood by me!
41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Magazine prescriptions? Did I understand you correctly? None. I don’t do drugs.
42.Which are better legos or lincoln logs?
Legos with Lincoln logs. It’s a big building adventure!
43. Are you stubborn?
OHHHH YEAH!
44. Who is better...Leno or Letterman?
Hmmmm. I grew up on Letterman. Top Ten reasons to stop now before I bore you all! 10. Joe, you aren’t funny.
#9. See number 10.
#8… I … moving on.
45. Ever watch soap operas?
Well, no. I leave the soap alone. Besides, my soap doesn’t sing very well.
46. Afraid of heights?
Well, not sure. I live in Illinois, and it is pretty much all ground level here.
47. Sing in the car?
Yeah, and at home and at the bar and at the corner and at the….
48. Dance in the shower?
No. I do the morning shower.. .and, I don’t feel like dancing at 6AM. I don’t feel like much of anything at 6AM except shower, which I do habitually.
49. Dance in the car?
How in the world does one do that?
50. Ever used a gun?
Yes. I have also used a laser pointer. Laser pointers are much more fun. Get 'em in the eye!
51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
Ummmm… I avoid cameras. You don’t want my mug on any picture.
52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Depends on the sauce you serve with it. Try chocolate sauce.
53. Is Christmas stressful?
I don’t usually think about it.
54. Ever eat pirogies?
GO POLES! GO POLES!!! Have I ever eaten pirogies? Is the Pope catholic?
55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
Apple… And cherry.. and blueberry… and raspberry… and… berry-berry.
56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Total global dictator!
57. Do you believe in ghosts?
Do they believe in me?
58. Ever have a deja-vu feeling?
Well, yes. I do. In fact, at the moment I remembered being asked question 43 before. I get that one a lot.
59. Take a vitamin daily?
Yes. I take it shopping.
60. Wear slippers?
On my ears, baby!
61. Wear a bathrobe?
On my feet!
62. What do you wear to bed?
Dinner!
63. First concert?
No, yours?
64. Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart?
Blue, Red, Blue Light... All I have to say is, watch for those falling prices!
65. Nike or Adidas?
Shoes, right?
66.Cheetos Or Fritos?
Cheese Nips!
67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
I like vanilla.
68. Ever hear of, "gorp"?
Ever hear of, "nope"?
69. Ever take dance lessons?
I think so... long ago. When my parents were trying to help me socialize. Didn't work.
71. Can you curl your tongue?
Nah. I don't curl. But, I LA! LA! LA! with my tongue.
72. Ever won a spelling bee?
Yup, but I wish to return it. I have no use for one of these things.
73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
No. I seriously don't try to show any emotion. This is why people probably ask, "Joe, are you okay? You look grumpy!"
74. Own any record albums?
I guess.
75. Own a record player?
If you mean I-pod, yes.
76. Regularly burn incense?
If you mean when I am incensed? Yeah, I burn!
77. Ever been in love?
Yeah... I was... WITH GUINNESS!!! Well, actually, I was and I really got taken for a ride like I will never forget. And, quite frankly, I would rather not go through THAT again. Maybe, that is why I haven't dated in so long. I still feel the scars.
78. Who would you like to see in concert?
Wilco.
79. What was the last concert you saw?
Some little bandy thingy.
80. Hot tea or cold tea?
Earl Grey.
81.Tea or coffee?
Coffee
82.Favorite kind of cookie?
I don’t have one.
83.Can you swim well?
Yes,… well, I don’t drown. At least not yet.
85. Are you patient?
No, now let’s move on!
86. DJ or band, at a wedding?
Open bar. … Yes, open bar!
87.Ever won a contest?
Yes. I won a writing contest. I am sure you can’t tell from this drivel.
88. Ever have plastic surgery?
I cut up a plastic cup once. It didn’t make it.
89. Which are better black or green olives?
I don’t like olives.
90.Can you knit or crochet?
I can wear knitted things and I have slept under crocheted blankets before.
91. What color is your bathroom?
I have never noticed. To be honest, these things don’t really interest me. It could be blue or black, and I just wouldn’t care.
94. Who is/was your HS crush?
Erica… But, she was not very friendly.
95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your way?
No. I do swear on occasion.
96. Do you have kids?
No.
97. Do you want kids?
Want them where?
98. What are your favorite colors?
I don’t have a favorite color. BUT, I guess, I do like the earthy tones.
99. Do you miss anyone right now?
Yes.
100. Who do you wanna see right now?
A friendly face.
Let's play!
But, first, The goal with these question type thingys is to reveal NOTHING about me. That is, if you don't know much about me now, the following reveals nothing further. If anything, it reveals that 1) I have too much time on my hands, 2) am not very clever, 3) Could possibly live a very non-productive life. With that said, here is to non-productivity!
PROST!!!
100 Completely Useless and NON revealing Facts About Me
1. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
I don’t usually have that one that opens into “other side” open much. This little girl got sucked in and she keeps calling for her mother. Shut-up, kid. The one to Narnia? I nailed that one shut almost immediately. Nobody, I mean nobody is going to be going and playing with Lions on my watch. No sir!
2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels?
Often. Damn fine eating. Great with Syrup!
3. What’s your favorite love story?
The typical one… boy meets girl… girl dumps boy. Boy gets back together with girl. Girl cheats on guy. Girl dies in tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.
…. Good year?
… No, the worst!
(Thanks “Naked Gun”)
4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
Yes. It was a railroad crossing sign near my summer home in Wisconsin. It had bullet holes in it. I still have it.
Now, what the hell am I going to do with it?
5. Last person that kissed you?
I guess, recently, it was my baby niece. She said good-bye and then Happy Thanksgiving. Which is really interesting, because it was last Saturday.
6. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
On a Magazine, sure… In a Magazine. Kinda cramped. I am not a small person.
12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
No. Ummm… No. I actually try to avoid walking. I sooo want one of the Segways.
13. Have you ever camped in the woods?
Sure, I guess. Is this a useless fact, or just kinda a boring fact.
14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
Yes, sure. I am not one who is shy from making a fool of myself. I consider that, you know, fool making, one of my hobbies! Go hobbies!
15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
I write with them too. Personally, I prefer candy bars. However, you can't write with those... well.
16. How many people have you slept with this week?
Counting my three pillows, remote control, reading book, yesterday’s clothing, a comforter, another comforter, last week's clothing, a sock… nobody. Well, nobody that I can find.
18. What is your "song of the week"?
Christmas Time is Here by the great Vince Guraldi.
19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Ummmm… I wear orange and blue. That’s kinda pink, right? No? Okay, then no.
20.Do you still watch cartoons?
Hell yeah! I think, most of the time, that’s all I watch.
22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
No where! I would spend that shit before I even thought about burying it. This is a stupid question.
23. What do you drink with dinner?
That implies I eat dinner. I haven’t eaten a square meal in weeks.
24. What sauce do you dip Chicken McNuggets in?
I don’t eat chicken nuggets, but I do dip chicken wings in Ranch and Blue Cheese AND.. that’s about it.
25. What is your favorite food/cuisine?
Popcorn and Popcorn cuisine… That’s in the freezer section.
26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Shoot… I have many. MANY!
28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
I scouted for girls. Not very lucky on that front. Sigh.
30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
Ummmm…… Let me think. Hmmm… Well… no… I guess it was Gemma in the Third Grade. There, you can see, is where I started my great communication skills or lack there of. Heh. Writing people! Whateva!
31. Can you change the oil on a car?
Change it to what?
32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Sure. I got a couple. What’s it to you? Trying to make yourself feel better?
33. Run out of gas?
Yeah, I am. I kinda feel sluggish and tired all of sudden. Too many damn questions!
34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
The Edible kind. Plastic sandwiches? No. They taste all yucky.
35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Cats.
36. What is your usual bedtime?
I haven’t had a usual bedtime ever. Unusual, sure. That would be next week.
37. Are you lazy?
Hell yeah! I am surprised I made it to question 37.
38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
Other kids!
40. How many languages can you speak?
Counting English? 1000… 999 of those are only understood by me!
41. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Magazine prescriptions? Did I understand you correctly? None. I don’t do drugs.
42.Which are better legos or lincoln logs?
Legos with Lincoln logs. It’s a big building adventure!
43. Are you stubborn?
OHHHH YEAH!
44. Who is better...Leno or Letterman?
Hmmmm. I grew up on Letterman. Top Ten reasons to stop now before I bore you all! 10. Joe, you aren’t funny.
#9. See number 10.
#8… I … moving on.
45. Ever watch soap operas?
Well, no. I leave the soap alone. Besides, my soap doesn’t sing very well.
46. Afraid of heights?
Well, not sure. I live in Illinois, and it is pretty much all ground level here.
47. Sing in the car?
Yeah, and at home and at the bar and at the corner and at the….
48. Dance in the shower?
No. I do the morning shower.. .and, I don’t feel like dancing at 6AM. I don’t feel like much of anything at 6AM except shower, which I do habitually.
49. Dance in the car?
How in the world does one do that?
50. Ever used a gun?
Yes. I have also used a laser pointer. Laser pointers are much more fun. Get 'em in the eye!
51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
Ummmm… I avoid cameras. You don’t want my mug on any picture.
52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Depends on the sauce you serve with it. Try chocolate sauce.
53. Is Christmas stressful?
I don’t usually think about it.
54. Ever eat pirogies?
GO POLES! GO POLES!!! Have I ever eaten pirogies? Is the Pope catholic?
55. Favorite type of fruit pie?
Apple… And cherry.. and blueberry… and raspberry… and… berry-berry.
56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Total global dictator!
57. Do you believe in ghosts?
Do they believe in me?
58. Ever have a deja-vu feeling?
Well, yes. I do. In fact, at the moment I remembered being asked question 43 before. I get that one a lot.
59. Take a vitamin daily?
Yes. I take it shopping.
60. Wear slippers?
On my ears, baby!
61. Wear a bathrobe?
On my feet!
62. What do you wear to bed?
Dinner!
63. First concert?
No, yours?
64. Wal-Mart, Target or K-Mart?
Blue, Red, Blue Light... All I have to say is, watch for those falling prices!
65. Nike or Adidas?
Shoes, right?
66.Cheetos Or Fritos?
Cheese Nips!
67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
I like vanilla.
68. Ever hear of, "gorp"?
Ever hear of, "nope"?
69. Ever take dance lessons?
I think so... long ago. When my parents were trying to help me socialize. Didn't work.
71. Can you curl your tongue?
Nah. I don't curl. But, I LA! LA! LA! with my tongue.
72. Ever won a spelling bee?
Yup, but I wish to return it. I have no use for one of these things.
73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
No. I seriously don't try to show any emotion. This is why people probably ask, "Joe, are you okay? You look grumpy!"
74. Own any record albums?
I guess.
75. Own a record player?
If you mean I-pod, yes.
76. Regularly burn incense?
If you mean when I am incensed? Yeah, I burn!
77. Ever been in love?
Yeah... I was... WITH GUINNESS!!! Well, actually, I was and I really got taken for a ride like I will never forget. And, quite frankly, I would rather not go through THAT again. Maybe, that is why I haven't dated in so long. I still feel the scars.
78. Who would you like to see in concert?
Wilco.
79. What was the last concert you saw?
Some little bandy thingy.
80. Hot tea or cold tea?
Earl Grey.
81.Tea or coffee?
Coffee
82.Favorite kind of cookie?
I don’t have one.
83.Can you swim well?
Yes,… well, I don’t drown. At least not yet.
85. Are you patient?
No, now let’s move on!
86. DJ or band, at a wedding?
Open bar. … Yes, open bar!
87.Ever won a contest?
Yes. I won a writing contest. I am sure you can’t tell from this drivel.
88. Ever have plastic surgery?
I cut up a plastic cup once. It didn’t make it.
89. Which are better black or green olives?
I don’t like olives.
90.Can you knit or crochet?
I can wear knitted things and I have slept under crocheted blankets before.
91. What color is your bathroom?
I have never noticed. To be honest, these things don’t really interest me. It could be blue or black, and I just wouldn’t care.
94. Who is/was your HS crush?
Erica… But, she was not very friendly.
95. Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your way?
No. I do swear on occasion.
96. Do you have kids?
No.
97. Do you want kids?
Want them where?
98. What are your favorite colors?
I don’t have a favorite color. BUT, I guess, I do like the earthy tones.
99. Do you miss anyone right now?
Yes.
100. Who do you wanna see right now?
A friendly face.
posted by "Just" Joe at 10:15 PM
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