Fun with Conversation Hearts!

I was thinking about yesterday's entry, well, the part about not having someone to talk too. I live alone, and have a fish who doesn't say much... So, instead of actually finding someone to talk to, I did the next best thing. I bought a bag of conversation hearts. Let's see what they say?

Me: Hi, Conversation Hearts (CH)! How are you today?
CH: "Wild Life!"
Me: Really, CH? How come?
CH: "Marry Me"
Me: Ummmm.... CH, ummmm, we just met. Hell, I just bought you. You're a tad forward, aren't you?
CH: "Melt my"...something that looks like some sort of shape (It could be a shape... might be a blemish).
Me: What?
CH: Shape thingy "of Gold" (It might be a heart shape).
Me: Huh?
CH: "Kiss me"
Me: Kiss you? How about I eat you instead?
CH: Smiley face.
Me: Alrighty then! Me eats! Me eats!
(I eat.)
CH: "Sure Love"
Me: What the hell does that mean?
CH: "My love"
Me: You're confusing me here, CH. What's with all this love shit?
CH: "My baby"
Me: Okay, it's your baby... It isn't my baby. I have never met you before, until today.
CH: "Call me"
Me: Call you what?
CH: "Call me"
Me: I got that, but call you what?
CH: Something illegible.
Me: Listen, you have to speak up. I can't understand you.
CH: "My love"
Me: Is that what you want me to call you? My love? I dunno.
CH: Something"Ax Me"
Me: Listen, "sugar pie," I ain't understanding what the hell you are saying.
CH: Something"mile"
Me: Okay... If you don't make yourself more clear. I am outta here.
CH: Smiley face.
Me: Okay, you're just fucking with me.
CH: "Sunshine"
Me: Dude, it's fucking raining outside. What the fuck?
CH: "Dea"something "one".
Me: You are starting to piss me off.
CH: "Do good"
Me: Yeah, I just might, buy throwing your worthless Necco ass into the garbage.
CH: blank
Me: Speechless, eh? I thought so, dumbass.
CH: "Only you"
Me: No... I am sure other people are just as annoyed at you.
CH: "Heat wave"
Me: Either you are on something, or you're just dumb. It just dropped 20 degrees in the last 15 minutes!!!!
CH: "Hug me"
Me: I don't think so.
CH: "Kiss me"
Me: Fuck this... I'm outta here!
CH: Blemish
Me: Yeah, fuck.
CH: "ove"
Me: I have to pick the conversation hearts with a complete lack of any knowledge of the English language.
CH: "My love"
Me: Bite me.


Later!