Bad Karma Days...
It never really ends, does it? If it isn't one thing, it is another. I did laundry, and it never dried. I have clothing everywhere. I didn't have enough quarters to finish the job. It's rather cold in here as I have my army of wind blowing devices working on trying to rectify the situation. I have never lived in an apartment where the dryer actually dried. It's about the quarters, I think. Those rat bastards want more quarters! BUT, I won't let them have any satisfaction by giving the greedy nasties more quarters! No state quarters for you! AND, what else? I had flat while driving on Friday. Almost a flat. Saturday morning was spent running around getting that taken care of and pronto. I needed the care for business. That, and to actually go anywhere. Sunday, I was sick in to the stomach because I had to have that extra beer. Ummmm... Sunday, I was pelted with snow balls from the sky. That shit hurt! . Ummmmm... I was hit in the face at work on Monday. .... And, it goes on and on. So, today, I have decided to call in dead.
Therefore, it's time for some RANDOM THOUGHTS!!! BUT, not many, because, after all, I called in dead. I don't want to spook anybody with voices of the deceased.
1. If you look at the ingredients of a water bottle, it is clear that water really isn't very good for you. It offers absolutely nothing, in terms of nutrition. Weird.
2. My iPod was in my pocket. My mints were in my pocket. The iPod somehow got into the mints... And, when I reached for the iPod, it had fresh minty breath... and covered with mint dust. What the hell was it doing with the mints in my pocket? That, and I played my top 25 songs. Selection 24 and 25? I have really ever listened to those tracks! I am thinking the mints had something to do with it. Bad mints! BAD!
3. How does a single man have such a messy apartment? I only really live in one room! AND, that room is actually pretty clean! I am thinking that my stuff is secretly planning to kill me, and when I leave, it situates itself in strategic positions to eventually overwhelm and then murder me. But, don't worry folks. I have put some of it away! "Curses," say my things. "Foiled again!"
4. Altoids? I am thinking that they aren't all that curiously strong.
5. I had popcorn for dinner last night. I had it the night before. I had it the night before that. When do I start emitting ethonal?
6. My good watch has run out of battery juice. My shit $5 watch is still going strong after several years. Now explain that to me?
7. I don't understand the coffee machines that make only one cup of coffee. How can anybody have just one cup of coffee? That's just insane! It is almost as insane as Altoids saying they are curiously strong! I have never once even thought about the strength of Altoids. Never, ever been curious. EVER!
8. They now have chocolate covered Altoids. Okay, who out there said, "I am curious! How would Altoids taste with chocolate covering?" I want to meet you. Because, man, I thought I had no life! You're thinking about ALTOIDS!
9. I like Altoids tins... I store stuff in some of them like toothpicks and spare change. Dead bodies don't fit. My suggestion is to keep contents on the smaller side.
AND, finally!
10. WHERE ARE MY KEYS!?!?!?!?
Later.
Therefore, it's time for some RANDOM THOUGHTS!!! BUT, not many, because, after all, I called in dead. I don't want to spook anybody with voices of the deceased.
1. If you look at the ingredients of a water bottle, it is clear that water really isn't very good for you. It offers absolutely nothing, in terms of nutrition. Weird.
2. My iPod was in my pocket. My mints were in my pocket. The iPod somehow got into the mints... And, when I reached for the iPod, it had fresh minty breath... and covered with mint dust. What the hell was it doing with the mints in my pocket? That, and I played my top 25 songs. Selection 24 and 25? I have really ever listened to those tracks! I am thinking the mints had something to do with it. Bad mints! BAD!
3. How does a single man have such a messy apartment? I only really live in one room! AND, that room is actually pretty clean! I am thinking that my stuff is secretly planning to kill me, and when I leave, it situates itself in strategic positions to eventually overwhelm and then murder me. But, don't worry folks. I have put some of it away! "Curses," say my things. "Foiled again!"
4. Altoids? I am thinking that they aren't all that curiously strong.
5. I had popcorn for dinner last night. I had it the night before. I had it the night before that. When do I start emitting ethonal?
6. My good watch has run out of battery juice. My shit $5 watch is still going strong after several years. Now explain that to me?
7. I don't understand the coffee machines that make only one cup of coffee. How can anybody have just one cup of coffee? That's just insane! It is almost as insane as Altoids saying they are curiously strong! I have never once even thought about the strength of Altoids. Never, ever been curious. EVER!
8. They now have chocolate covered Altoids. Okay, who out there said, "I am curious! How would Altoids taste with chocolate covering?" I want to meet you. Because, man, I thought I had no life! You're thinking about ALTOIDS!
9. I like Altoids tins... I store stuff in some of them like toothpicks and spare change. Dead bodies don't fit. My suggestion is to keep contents on the smaller side.
AND, finally!
10. WHERE ARE MY KEYS!?!?!?!?
Later.
posted by "Just" Joe at 9:27 PM
1 Comments:
Check the couch cushions. That's where everything ends up.
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