NORTH!!!

I have noticed a trend among Chicagoans, and I am no exception. We have a summer migratory pattern towards the North. Some go south around Lake Michigan and then head north to well Michigan. Me, like several others, we just go North to Cheeseland. That's where I was this weekend along with several others who I like to call "boat toting bastards." These people forget they have boats on their car's asses and almost hit me as they change lanes to pass my, I guess very slow, 75 - 80 mph. Ahh Wisconsin! Yes, there I was, in the middle of the woods, being quite cold and wet. I often look forward to opening up the summer home. Not this time. Not only was the placed robbed for a thrid straight year (they didn't take much. One item was a nightlight of all the damn things. Asked why I didn't go fill out a police report, I merely said, "I didn't want to deal with the embarrassment of saying to an officer, "They took my nightlight!), but I was alone... and that means, I did the work. I volunteered because of a family emergency, but damnit! That place is hard work. There I was, cold and wet as I said, raking, mowing, cleaning, and doing general fixing of winter damage. I don't think I would've minded as much if I wasn't cold and wet... The rain poured down and down and down... and the temperature followed suit. There is nothing worse then being in the woods with a downward trend going on. But, Wisconsin! I love it (when not cold and wet). The trees! The fresh air! The beer! The cheese curds! The cheap steak (which I didn't buy because I was on a budget. I ate two sandwiches all weekend, and get this! I drank only one beer! I just drank water! WATER! No yeast, malts, or hops in it! I think that is against the law in Wisconsin isn't it?) The state rocks! I can't wait to get back up there (sans rain) to continue the enjoyment of the great outdoors. There is something just damn cool about hearing an owl as you stand in the trees with a rake while you hope that it is just an owl because what animal would be afraid of a rake. Let's face it, rakes are not a type of tool that instills fear in would be attacking, hungry animals. Maybe a deer would be afraid of a rake. They don't seem to be afraid of cars anymore telling from the evidence all over the roadways. I think somebody should tell the deer that they should maybe start being afraid again, especially of those "boat toting bastards." Cars kill! Rakes? Not very scary. You know what is scary? That bug I saw dead on the floor. That thing was scary. I have no idea what it was. Now, it's garbage. Speaking of bugs, I think my cabin is actually the long lost bug burial ground. There is a sure fair amount of dead bugs all over upon returning after returning for the season. I think Lady Bug X says to Lady Bug Y, "Hey, time to go die! Joe's Cabin? The infamous dead bug burial ground?" "Sure," says Lady Bug Y. "I want to die!" Thus, they go, and die ... ALL OVER! Nothing like opening a cabin loaded with stagnat dead lady bug air! And they do stink! And, the little bastards bite! Did you know that? They bite hard! But, in an hour or so of obsessive vacumming (after buying a new one cus the old one was stolen), the dead bug problem was no more. Those robbers stole my saws, too! MY SAWS!!! In the end, it was a successful trip. The cabin is ladybugless, I survived the "boat toting bastards," I am dry and warm, and the place is ready for fun.... Ahh Wisconsin! Come, come with me and migrate North!